How do you want to be remembered?
Researchers from three prominent universities in 2025 analyzed 38 million obituaries to help answer that question.1
To no surprise, two values stood out from the 6.6 billion words reviewed.
People want to be remembered for their faith in God. In 80% of obituaries, words like “church,” “Bible,” “praying,” and “faithful” appeared.
A close second—in 76% of obituaries—were words like “family,” “loving,” and “caring,” suggesting that the departed wanted to pass those values on to the people who mattered most to them.
At the bottom of the list were the concepts of success or status, suggesting that material riches are rendered trivial when a person finally faces their Creator.
It’s faith. It’s caring for others. It’s relationships and traditions that connect us.
“If you thought you might die today or Christ might return tonight, how would your passions or daily activities change?” writes Mick Owens, author of the book Diamond of Life: The Five P’s of Success and Significance.
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” 2 Timothy 4:7
Tips from Toastmasters2
Toastmasters International, dedicated to building speech-giving skills through practice in a supportive, learn-by-doing environment, offers tips for those asked to honor someone by delivering a eulogy.
Write it out. In detail. And practice, practice, practice.
Focus on two or three main points. Remember to breathe and gather yourself. The audience supports you.
A eulogy should not be the chronology of a person’s life but a tribute to it.
Tell a meaningful story. During the story, look up and make eye contact with the audience.
Find an inspiring message. Try to help people as they manage their grief.
Limit gestures. A memorial service does not lend itself to big movements. Relax your body language.
Above all else, when delivering a eulogy, speak from your heart. It’s okay to show emotion, but consider saying a prayer before you begin, as this can help to keep your focus. Remember, it’s not about you.
cfd Tools
Remembrance and Services Memorandum
Being at a loss for words when creating a eulogy is common due to the intense emotional weight and the pressure to “get it right.”
Our Remembrance and Services Memorandum is designed to help guide your family and friends during this time.
The 10-page document includes instructions on who to notify after your death, what personal information to include in notices or eulogies, instructions for handling remains, and any miscellaneous information you’d like them to share.
We structured the document for people who say, “I don’t know where I’d begin.” It will help you organize your thoughts and express your wishes. It can also provide some key details and precious moments you’d like others to remember.
- PNAS. org, August 26, 2025
- Toastmasters.org, 2026
